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Anything goes...a poem, a story, a few words...
To what extent is it implied?
To what extent is it internalized?
To what extent is it inherited?
To what extent is it realized?
Is it shown by hugs and kisses?
Is it shown by visits home?
Is it shown by sparkling eyes?
Is it shown by words alone?
How do you know if someone does?
How do you know if it’s done to you?
How do you know if they knew that you did?
How do you know if it’s really true?
What if you think you did it wrong?
What if you never made the time?
What if you missed your chance to show?
Could all be fixed by a simple rhyme?
Does it leave because you’re gone?
Does it still live on past death?
Does it die because you died?
Do you hear me when I say “I’m sorry Seth”?
I’d do anything for one more second,
I’d know just what to do,
I’d be finished with eternal questions,
I’d say, “Seth, I LOVE YOU.”
-Samantha Dworken
Messages.
...
his permission we are reprinting this beautiful tribute. Thank you Jay.
A son, a grandson, a stepson, a nephew, a cousin, a friend, a boyfriend, a student, a man, a young man … just a
boy. Seth Baumgartner.
Over the last few days I’ve had the opportunity to listen to people talk about experiences they had with Seth. It
was interesting to see how their faces would light up as they told their stories about a kid who seems to have
been put on this planet to make people feel good. From family to friends to parents of friends, they all seemed
to say the same thing. “He was a great kid, a caring kid, he always put others first, he would be the first to
defend the defenseless”.
Not everyone here knows that there are some who truly believed that he was a quiet, shy kid. As far back as
Kindergarten his teacher believed he was too shy and would have too much difficulty in making friends to move
on to the 1st grade … I look a round here … it doesn’t appear to be true. I’m glad people came to their senses
and allowed him to move on with the other kids.
I believe that from a very young age actions looked at all together define the person. Seth was a collector. He
collected a lot of things. He collected Match Box Cars. Okay a lot of us collected Match Box cars. Well, he
also collected Baseball Cards, and Hockey cards. He collected other sports items, like those little Baseball
Helmets, the kind that some places serve ice cream in. Also little sports figures with Big heads, I had never seen
them before but he was real proud to show me his room with shelves of these little guys. He even collected
MLB All-Star Ballots. It’s funny he talked about what these collections would be worth some day and how he’d
make a lot of money when he sold them. He never seemed to be able to part with them though. Early on in his
collection career he got caught up in the Beanie babies craze, he collected the regular beanie babies even the mini-
beanie babies. He eventually moved on to Shot Glasses and Hard Rock Café pins.
It appears to me that he also collected friends. I overheard on Monday when about 30 of Seth’s friends were
sitting on the lawn in front of Seth’s house how the large group of friends were starting to split, like what typically
happens when you get older and start having different needs goals, but as this one boy put it, Seth was in the
middle, trying to hold the group, his collection of friends, together.
Seth was born just 11 days after my daughter Samantha. They grew up together and it was fun to watch how
they developed. When it came time to reading, well Samantha would be able to read the typical things that a little
girl from LI need to read … Macy’s, Toys-R-Us. Saks … and Seth … well, he wouldn’t be reading that … He’
d climb up to the kitchen table, open the newspaper, turn to the back and start reading the box scores of the
baseball games. Before you knew it, he was reading and quoting baseball stats before most kids new what
baseball was. He quickly turned into the ideal companion for his grandfather, Gary, to watch the Mets with.
Seth fit right in with a family of Met fans. He was also growing up in a household of NY Ranger fans, you’d think
he’d quickly join the bandwagon and start routing for them right away. And it would have been that way except
for the name Baumgartner … for those of you who know hockey … back in Seth’s hockey informative years,
about age four thru seven, the NY Islanders had a player named Ken Baumgartner. Seth actually met him and
that was it … there was an Islander fan in our midst.
But his involvement in sports didn’t end there. At a very young age, through his mother’s involvement in the
Hamlet Challenge Tennis Tournament here in Commack, Seth got the opportunity to go see and meet
professional tennis players. And this so called shy kid did something that I don’t think most kids would think of
doing. No he didn’t try and take advantage and go around gathering autographs, he went around trying to see
how many “high fives” he could get. At the end of each of the days he would be so proud to tell everyone “Hey
I got High Fived” today by whoever it was that day and couldn’t wait to the next day to get some more. And
wouldn’t you know it … the players all ended up knowing him and I think he got just about everyone he tried
for. After a few years he became a ball boy at the tournament. I actually watched the tournament and got mad
when they would break to a commercial or move the camera just when Seth would be coming into view.
But Seth’s involvement in sports wasn’t only as a spectator. He was a runner. And a very good one at that.
For a while, he would run everywhere. He became determined, I think he was 12, to run in the LI marathon.
This is a little over 13 miles. This is no small endeavor. I think finishing would have been a great accomplishment
… not only did he finish … but … he took first place in his age group. His father, who ran with Seth in the race,
finished a little behind him.
One of the other things that Seth enjoyed was traveling. He looked forward to going on his many trips. It could
have been Maine, or the West Coast, or Canada or Paris. Seth would always come back with stories of what a
great time he had. Whether it was being able to see a moose up close in Maine or visiting 4 baseball parks along
the west coast and then driving to Mexico or going to Buffalo, Toronto and Quebec and getting a pin from the
Hard Rock Café in each of the cities or going to Paris and trying to speak French to the natives, Seth would
always have a great story to tell.
Thoughtful. Seth spent a lot of time growing up in his grandparents house. There he’d get his lesson in, and
probably more than any child should need to know, in Blue Willow. Yes the China pattern that my parents
collected and have decorated their house in. My parents would go to the yearly convention no matter what state
it was being held in. Well the year after my father passed away, my mother did something I didn’t ever expect
her to do. She decided she would go there by herself. I remember thinking this would be good for her. Keep
doing what she and my father so enjoyed. But, it was her 14 or 15 year old grandson, Seth, that thought, “she
shouldn’t go alone” and he volunteered to escort her and did. I don’t know many kids that would volunteer to
travel alone with a grandparent to hang out with a bunch of “older” people showing plates and lamps and
whatever else they could get that pattern to stick to. Once again Seth put others before him.
When Seth turned seventeen he got a gift from his grandmother Ann. It was a silver acura integra. It was my
father’s, his grandfather’s before he passed away five years ago. It had been sitting idle in their driveway. Seth
seemed to have a need transform this car into what he dreamed it could be. But he knew he’d need money to do
that. So, he landed a job at Waldbaums. He actually loved his job (well at least the people he met there and
worked with). He put every cent he earned into his car. He was really proud of how it was turning out.
Seth just graduated from Commack HS, the same HS his mother, aunt and uncle graduated from. He was
admitted to Stony Brook University, my alma mater. We were all so excited for him. He would have majored in
Sports Management. I’m sure he would have done great. He always seemed to accomplish what he set out to
do.
I stated earlier that everybody said what a good kid Seth was, his father, Art, couldn’t stress it enough to me, his
stepfather, Jim, who knew that a stepson could always say “you’re not my dad, you can’t tell me what to do” …
told me he never heard that from Seth. I’m sure he never even thought it. His mother, Roberta, reminded me of
and told me stories of how Seth always had a smile, would come into the house and just hang out with her and
watch television or talk, the perfect son.
I’ve had the opportunity to visit the site of this tragedy and see the outpouring of love for this mere 18 year old.
Friends and family have gone there for there own personal reasons and left a small part of themselves to try and
comfort each other.
I believe we are all here for a purpose and we stay here until that purpose is complete. Some of us take longer
to complete that purpose than others. Seth must have been exceptional, because he accomplished it too quickly.
There is a proverb that says “ When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life in a manner
so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice.” I think…no I know … Seth has done that. He should
be proud of his life.
We will all miss you Seth … you will always be in our hearts and our thoughts.
